trump, pola asuh, dan dampaknya pada jutaan manusia.
“Donald today is much as he was at three years old: incapable of growing, learning, or evolving, unable to regulate his emotions, moderate his responses, or take in and synthesize information.”
― Mary L. Trump, Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World’s Most Dangerous Man
Donald Trump kena COVID-19. Beberapa cukup sopan untuk mengucap ucapan lekas sehat. Namun sebagian tertawa, menyumpahi. Hal ini dikarenakan Donald Trump dinilai tidak becus menangani COVID-19
Orang-orang menyoroti Trump, beserta kinerjanya beberapa tahun kebelakang yang meresahkan. Terlebih saat penanganan COVID-19.
Kemudian, beberapa waktu yang lalu, di salah satu post Instagram — muncul nama Mary L. Trump. Ia mengulas buku yang menjelaskan secara psikologi klinis, mengapa Trump bisa seberbahaya itu. Mary adalah keponakan dari Donald Trump.
Rupanya, ia banyak membahas bagaimana pola asuh orangtua Donald Trump yang baginya corrupted.
Mary Trump memaparkan, bahwa nuansa keluarganya yang patriarkis, tidak menghargai dan menempatkan emosi secara tepat. Fred Trump Sr ‘menghancurkan’ kemampuan Donald Trump untuk mengeksplorasi dan mengolah emosi secara matang.
“By limiting Donald’s access to his own feelings and rendering many of them unacceptable, Fred perverted his son’s perception of the world and damaged his ability to live in it.” Begitu tulis Mary Trump.
Mengutip istilah Lewis Howes, salah satu influencer, Fred Trump Sr. barangkali bisa dikatakan memiliki mental toxic masculinity. Melalui penuturan Mary, Fred begitu keras pada ayahnya (Fred Trump Jr.).
Persepsi Donald Trump terhadap Fred Jr, pun dikata Mary ‘terpengaruh’ dengan bagaiamana kakeknya memperlakukan ayahnya. Donald Trump, dibilang Mary, malah anteng nonton di bioskop ketika kakaknya Fred Jr. sekarat.
Berbohong, juga seolah dibenarkan dalam keluarga Trump. Mary menulis soal neneknya yang menerima aduan Robert Trump (adik Donald Trump) terhadap ancaman Donald yang mau merusak truknya.
Alih-alih berupaya mencari jalan tengah menyelesaikan masalah, neneknya malah menyembunyikan truk tersebut dan menghukum Robert, bukan Donald.
Tidak hanya itu, Fred Trump Sr. juga diketahui sering menyembunyikan buku kas istrinya. Ketika istrinya mengetahui bahwa suaminya menyembunyikan bukunya, Fred Sr. malah menuduh istrinya ingin ‘membangkrutkan’ suaminya.
Mary menyimpulkan, hal tersebut barangkali yang menyebabkan Donald Trump ‘biasa saja’ ketika memanipulasi atau berbohong akan sesuatu.
Mengenai bagaimana Donald Trump gelagapan menangani COVID-19, Mary menghubungkannya dengan bagaimana Fred Trump Sr. mengajari Donald Trump soal yang lemah akan kalah.
“The simple fact is that Donald is fundamentally incapable of acknowledging the suffering of others. Telling the stories of those we’ve lost would bore him. Acknowledging the victims of COVID-19 would be to associate himself with their weakness, a trait his father taught him to despise,” tulis Mary.
Mary bahkan berani mengatakan, ini adalah tragedi epik dari kegagalan kakeknya yang menyebabkan Donald Trump tidak mengerti bahwa nyawa orang lain begitu berharga.
—
Apakah kita bisa sepenuhnya percaya pada penuturan Mary L. Trump tentang pamannya? Mungkin tidak. Review dari sea.mashable.com mengungkapkan bahwa Mary kurang berjarak, langsung menyimpulkan sesuatu akan keadaan keluarganya ketimbang memamarkan fakta secara komprehensif.
Namun Mashable dapat berempati, bahwa hal-hal sulit yang terjadi di keluarganya bisa jadi membuat Mary Trump sangat tertekan.
Bagaimanapun kadar ‘keabsahan’ keluh kesah Mary, saya simpulkan — jika pola asuh orangtua memegang peranan penting — mengenai bagaimana ia mempersepsi dirnya dan orang lain. Bahkan memengaruhi cara beragam pemimpin negara dalam mengelola negerinya.
Ngeri, bukan?
Ketika kita dipusingkan oleh kelakuan politisi atau pemimpin publik yang ‘aneh’, barangkali kita dapat menelusuri bagaimana cara ia dibesarkan. Kendati, tentu, ada faktor-faktor lain yang menyebabkan ‘kelakuan aneh’ tersebut.
Lantas bagaimana dengan pola asuh Joe Biden? Bagaimana itu akan memengaruhi cara ia memimpin negara, jika ia terpilih? Barangkali ada yang punya referensi bagaimana pola asuh orangtuanya?
Bagaimana dengan pola asuh orangtua Jokowi?
Bagaimana dengan pola asuh orangtua Terawan Agus Yulianto? #eh
Mikirin dan penasaran dengan orang lain boleh. Tapi, pertanyaan yang terpenting:
Bagaimana pola asuh orangtua kita, beserta baik dan buruknya? Apa yang dapat kita pelajari, dan mana yang perlu kita tinggalkan?
Dan, bagaimana dengan pola asuh kita pada anak-anak kita kelak? Sudahkah dipersiapkan matang?***
—
Want to Read
Rate this book
1 of 5 stars2 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars
Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World's Most Dangerous Man by Mary L. Trump
43,155 ratings, 3.93 average rating, 7,089 reviews
Too Much and Never Enough Quotes Showing 1-30 of 372
“Donald today is much as he was at three years old: incapable of growing, learning, or evolving, unable to regulate his emotions, moderate his responses, or take in and synthesize information.”
― Mary L. Trump, Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World's Most Dangerous Man
“Donald was to my grandfather what the border wall has been for Donald: a vanity project funded at the expense of more worthy pursuits.”
― Mary L. Trump, Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World's Most Dangerous Man
“Though Donald’s fundamental nature hasn’t changed, since his inauguration the amount of stress he’s under has changed dramatically. It’s not the stress of the job, because he isn’t doing the job—unless watching TV and tweeting insults count. It’s the effort to keep the rest of us distracted from the fact that he knows nothing—about politics, civics, or simple human decency—that requires an enormous amount of work.”
― Mary L. Trump, Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World's Most Dangerous Man
“I hope this book will end the practice of referring to Donald’s “strategies” or “agendas,” as if he operates according to any organizing principles. He doesn’t. Donald’s ego has been and is a fragile and inadequate barrier between him and the real world, which, thanks to his father’s money and power, he never had to negotiate by himself. Donald has always needed to perpetuate the fiction my grandfather started that he is strong, smart, and otherwise extraordinary, because facing the truth—that he is none of those things—is too terrifying for him to contemplate.”
― Mary L. Trump, Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World's Most Dangerous Man
“Donald’s need for affirmation is so great that he doesn’t seem to notice that the largest group of his supporters are people he wouldn’t condescend to be seen with outside of a rally. His deep-seated insecurities have created in him a black hole of need that constantly requires the light of compliments that disappears as soon as he’s soaked it in. Nothing is ever enough.”
― Mary L. Trump, Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World's Most Dangerous Man
“He had all the confidence of a bully who knows he’s always going to get what he wants and never has to fight for it.”
― Mary L. Trump, Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World's Most Dangerous Man
“A large minority of people still confuse his arrogance for strength, his false bravado for accomplishment, and his superficial interest in them for charisma.”
― Mary L. Trump, Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World's Most Dangerous Man
“Many, but by no means all of us, have been shielded until now from the worst effects of his pathologies by a stable economy and a lack of serious crises. But the out-of-control COVID-19 pandemic, the possibility of an economic depression, deepening social divides along political lines thanks to Donald’s penchant for division, and devastating uncertainty about our country’s future have created a perfect storm of catastrophes that no one is less equipped than my uncle to manage. Doing”
― Mary L. Trump, Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World's Most Dangerous Man
“The simple fact is that Donald is fundamentally incapable of acknowledging the suffering of others. Telling the stories of those we’ve lost would bore him. Acknowledging the victims of COVID-19 would be to associate himself with their weakness, a trait his father taught him to despise. Donald can no more advocate for the sick and dying than he could put himself between his father and Freddy. Perhaps most crucially, for Donald there is no value in empathy, no tangible upside to caring for other people. David Corn wrote, “Everything is transactional for this poor broken human being. Everything.” It is an epic tragedy of parental failure that my uncle does not understand that he or anybody else has intrinsic worth.”
